Meaning of Life or Life of Meaning

My musings about life and what it all means for this mom, worker, wife, woman, human. What it's like to live with a tantrum-throwing toddler, a self-employed husband, work, housework, and the life or death of my own dreams. Maybe we all can get some free therapy out of it all.

Friday, July 29, 2005

surprise prescription

I went to my doctor yesterday for a yearly physical. The usual, tap on the knees, check cholesterol, etc. I am not sure what triggered it, but he recommended that I consider an anti-depressant. He is a very intuitive doctor. He was asking me about anxiety and other things. I am considering it. The ironic thing is, I thought my dh needed something for his issues and he didn't get anything when he got his physical, and I ended up with the prescription!

So here I am staring at a perscription for celexa to help with stress, anxiety, and certain thoughts. I don't know if I will try it or not.

I cannot decide when to have another baby. My dd need a sibling and has been asking for a little sister. I am not sure if I can handle another round of hyperemesis.

*Jaden

Friday, July 22, 2005

Life Sucks

I cried last night. It was the first time in ages. I was so physically and emotionally exhausted from work. My dd was asleep when I left and asleep when I returned home. When she is awake when I go to work, she screams, "Mommy don't go! Stay with me!" while clinging to my legs. Is this the good life?

My dh is not bringing any money home from his business. He admitted the amount of debt he has accumulated. It is astounding. His partner told him to take a few days off, he looked burned out. My dh is probably depressed, too. I see my retirement, my dd college education, the nice middle class life going down the drain. Face it, my dh cannot keep a job or make any money. I am wondering if he has ADD or some mental problem like that.

I am glad I got this new position because at least it pays (some of) the bills. There is no need to expect my dh to contribute anything.

My mortage is a month late and I can barely afford food after all the other bills. How do people survive? Why isn't one salary, that of a college educated person, enough to live on? This is not right. Something is wrong with this society. To afford kids, on has to work so much and miss out on so much of their childhood.

I have to go to work now. Please send thoughts and prayers for my life. Thanks*Jaden
 
You scored as Anarchism. <'Imunimaginative's Deviantart Page'>

Anarchism

75%

Democrat

67%

Socialist

50%

Fascism

50%

Green

50%

Nazi

33%

Republican

25%

Communism

17%

What Political Party Do Your Beliefs Put You In?
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You scored as Existentialism. Your life is guided by the concept of Existentialism: You choose the meaning and purpose of your life.

“Man is condemned to be free; because once thrown into the world, he is responsible for everything he does.”
“It is up to you to give [life] a meaning.”
--Jean-Paul Sartre

“It is man's natural sickness to believe that he possesses the Truth.”
--Blaise Pascal

More info at Arocoun's Wikipedia User Page...

Existentialism

90%

Utilitarianism

80%

Hedonism

80%

Strong Egoism

75%

Justice (Fairness)

50%

Kantianism

50%

Nihilism

45%

Divine Command

35%

Apathy

30%

What philosophy do you follow? (v1.03)
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You scored as agnosticism. You are an agnostic. Though it is generally taken that agnostics neither believe nor disbelieve in God, it is possible to be a theist or atheist in addition to an agnostic. Agnostics don't believe it is possible to prove the existence of God (nor lack thereof). Agnosticism is a philosophy that God's existence cannot be proven. Some say it is possible to be agnostic and follow a religion; however, one cannot be a devout believer if he or she does not truly believe.

agnosticism

96%

Satanism

71%

Paganism

67%

Christianity

58%

Islam

54%

Hinduism

54%

Buddhism

54%

atheism

50%

Judaism

38%

Which religion is the right one for you? (new version)
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You scored as Unipolar Depression. Congraulations! You are depressed! You know just how it feels to bear all the world's burdens, and the value of a 19-hour night's sleep. And you really hate that circle-guy thing on your Zoloft pill packets.

Unipolar Depression

50%

Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder

42%

Schizophrenia

42%

Eating Disorders

8%

Borderline Personality Disorder

8%

Antisocial Personality Disorder

0%

Which mental disorder do you have?
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